FuNNY POeMs

> >I wrote your name on sand it got washed.
> >
> > I wrote your name in air,it was blown away.then
> >
> > I wrote your name on my heart & i got Heart
Attack .
> >
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
> >
> > God saw me hungry, he created pizza .
> >
> > He saw me thirsty, he created pepsi .
> >
> > He saw me in dark, he created light .
> >
> > He saw me without problems, he created YOU.
> >
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
> >
> > Twinkle Twinkle little star
> >
> > You should know what you are
> >
> > And once you know what you are
> >
> > Mental hospital is not so far.
> >
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
> > The rain makes all things beautiful. The grass
and flowers too.
> >
> > If rain makes all things beautiful why doesn't it
rain on you?
> >
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
> > Roses are red, Violets are blue
> >
> > monkeys like u should be kept in zoo.
> >
> > Don't feel so angry you will find me there too
> >
> > not in cage but laughing at you.
> >
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
> >
> > When ur life is in darkness pray to God ask
him to
> > free u from darkness and if after you pray and
> > you are still in darkness, please pay your
ELECTRICITY BILL !

a small truth to make our lives 100%

if
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O
P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
is equal to
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12
13 14 15 16 1718 19 20 21 22
23 24 25 26
then hardwork=
H+A+R+D+W+O+R+K =
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%
only

knowledge=
K+N+O+W+L+E+D+G+E=
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%
only

love=
L+O+V+E=
12+15+22+5=54% only

luck=
L+U+C+K =
12+21+3+11 = 47% only
(don't most of us think this is most
important???)

then what makes 100% is it
money? ..... no
leadership? ...... no

every problem has a solution, only if
we perhaps change our attitude. to
go to the top, to that 100%.

what we really need to go further, a
bit more.......
attitude=
A+T+T+I+T+U+D+E =
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

it is our attitude towards life and
work that makes our life 100%

CoMMeNTs

Commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

Please KindLy Use ThIs aDDeD fEaTuRe

GiVE UR VieWs N CoMMenTs On THe PoSTs

ThanXxx

=)

DoC N LaWYeR

A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party.

Their conversation was constantly interrupted by
people describing their ailments and asking the
doctor for free medical advice.

After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked
the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from
asking you for legal advice when you're out of the
office?"

"I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I
send them a bill."

The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a
try.

The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor
prepared the bills.

When he went to place them in his mailbox, he
found a bill from the lawyer.

SarDaR JoKeS...

Santa Goes to heaven

Santa Singh was in the hospital, near death, so the family sent for his friend Banta. As Banta singh stood beside the bed, santa Singh's frail condition grew worse, and he motioned frantically for something to write on. Banta singh lovingly handed him a pen and piece of paper, and Santa used his last ounce of strength to scribble a note. Then he died. Banta singh thought it best not to look at the note just then, so he slipped it into his jacket pocket. Several days later, at the funeral, Banta singh was visting Santa's family. He realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he'd worn the day Santa died. "You know," he said, "Santa handed me a note just before he died. I haven't read it, but knowing Santa, I'm sure there's a word of inspiration there for us all." He unfolded the note and read aloud, "You're standing on my oxygen tube!"

-----------------------------------------------------
Santa Singh was walking on the road and paused to read the graffiti on the wall. It read "Padne waala gadha.".. Santa Singh thought for an hour, erased it and wrote back,"Likhne waala gadha.".

-----------------------------------------------------
Mrs. Banta Singh was in the habit of having long conversation on the telephone, sometimes going on over an hour. One day she hung up after 25 minutes."What is the matter today? asked her husband. "Today you had less than half an hour conversation on the phone." "I got a wrong number," replied Mrs. Banta Singh.
----------------------------------------------------

Banta Singh was in court charged with parking his car in a restricted area. The judge asked him if he had anything to say in his defence. "They should not put up such misleading notices,"said Banta Singh." It said , "FINE FOR PARKING HERE."

----------------------------------------------------
Two Sardarjis were in conversation on the beach :
Sardarji 1 :Praaji , Ise 'beach' kyo kaheete hai ?
Sardarji 2 : Tumhe nahe pata ?
Sardarji 1 : Nahe pata.
Sardarji 2 : Woh to Aasmaan aur Zameen ke beech mein hai esliye eesai beach kahete hai .
----------------------------------------------------
Santa Singh : 'Look Banta, what type of glasses they have made. The top is closed. How can you fill lassi in it ?' Banta Singh : 'Yes, that's funny. And even if you make a hole at the top, how will the lassi stay in the glass when the bottom is open?'
----------------------------------------------------
the lift of a high rise bulding. When the lift reached its destination, the liftman opened its gates and said, 'The 10th floor, beta.' 'Why did you call me beta?' demanded Banta Singh. D'I am not your son.' I called you beta because I brought you up,' replied the liftman.

RaTS URiNEs IS DANGEROUS!!!

A stock clerk was sent to clean up a storeroom in Maui, Hawaii.

When he got back, he was complaining that the storeroom was really filthy and that he had noticed dried mouse or rat droppings in some areas.

A couple of days later, he started to feel like he was coming down with a stomach flu, complained of sore joints and headaches, and began to vomit.

He went to bed and never really got up again. Within two days he was severely ill and weak. His blood sugar count was down to 66, and his face and eyes were yellow. He was rushed to the emergency at Pali-Momi, where he was diagnosed to be suffering from massive organ failure. He died shortly before midnight.

No one would have made the connection between his job and his death,had it not been for a doctor who specifically asked if he had been in a warehouse or exposed to dried rat or mouse droppings at any time. They said there is a virus (much like the Hanta virus) that lives in dried rat and mouse droppings.

Once dried, these droppings are like dust and can easily be breathed in or ingested if a person does not wear protective gear or fails to wash face and hands thoroughly.

An autopsy was performed on the clerk to verify the doctor's suspicions.

This is why it is extremely important to ALWAYS carefully rinse off the tops of canned sodas or foods, and to wipe off pasta packaging, cereal boxes, and so on.

Almost everything you buy in a supermarket was stored in a warehouse at one time or another, and stores themselves often have rodents.

Most of us remember to wash vegetables and fruits but never think of boxes and cans.

The ugly truth is, even the most modern, upper-class, super store has rats and mice. And their warehouse most assuredly does!

Whenever you buy any canned soft drink, please make sure that you wash the top with running water and soap or, if that is not available, drink with a straw.

The investigation of soda cans by the Center for Disease Control in Atlanta discovered that the tops of soda cans can be encrusted with dried rat's urine, which is so toxic it can be lethal. Canned drinks and other foodstuffs are stored in warehouses and containers that are usually infested with Rodents, and then they get transported to retail outlets without being properly cleaned.

T3A

1. People who use their "brain" to work or students
who study hard day
and night
- should drink more Chrysanthemum Tea.

2. People who need a lot of body energy to work or
those people that do
a lot of exercise everyday
- should drink Wu Loong Tea.

3. People who travel on a bike or work in dirty and
polluted places
- should drink Green Tea.

4. For those people who likes to sit down all day
long and not doing
anything even exercising
- must drink Green Tea and Flower Tea.

5. People who smoke and drink a lot of alcoholic
drinks
- should drink more Green Tea.

6. Carnnivore ( those people who must eat meat at
least once a day, or
feel sick or not feeling well
- try to drink some Wu Loong Tea.

7. Those people who go to the washroom too
often or too less
- should drink more Honey Tea

8. People with high cholesterol and high blood
pressure
- Wu Loong Tea, Green Tea.

9. Those who work with computers everyday
- need to drink a Lot of Tea (any tea will do).

Whenever you are working with the computer, you
should make some tea,
drink it when you are free.
Drinking Tea is healthy, it can protect and prevent
the harmful
Ultraviolet light from harming us (when using
computer).
Furthermore, it can also cure us when we are tired
and help making our
Body feel fresh again.

JoK3

A girl asks her boyfriend to come over
Friday night
and have
dinner with her parents. Since this is such
a big
event, the
girl announces to her boyfriend that after
dinner,
she would
like to go out and make love for the first
time.
* * * * * * * * * *
Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never
had sex
before, so
he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get
some
condoms. The
pharmacist helps the boy for about an
hour. He
tells the boy
everything there is to know about
condoms and
sex.
* * * * * * * * * *
At the register, the pharmacist asks the
boy how
many condoms
he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or
family pack.
The boy
insists on the family pack because he
thinks he
will be rather
busy, it being his first time and all.

* * * * * * * * * *

That night, the boy shows up at the girl's
parents
house and
meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm
so excited
for you to
meet my parents, come on in!"

* * * * * * * * * *

The boy goes inside and is taken to the
dinner
table where the
girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly
offers to
say grace
and bows his head.

* * * * * * * * * *

A minute passes, and the boy is still deep
in
prayer, with his
head down.

* * * * * * * * * *

10 minutes pass, and still no movement
from the
boy.

* * * * * * * * * *

Finally, after 20 minutes with his head
down, the
girlfriend
leans over and whispers to the
boyfriend, "I had no
idea you
were this religious."

* * * * * * * * * *

The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had
no idea
your father was
a pharmacist."
* * * * * * * * * *

That Old Question ....

CHILD: Dad, where did I come from?

DAD: Okay, we had to have this conversation
some day!.. Listen...Dad and mom met in a chat
room on the net. I set up a meeting with your mom
and we landed in the bathroom at the Cyber Caf?
Then, mom did some downloads from
dads memory stick and when dad was ready to
upload, we discovered that
there was no firewall.. Seeing that it was a bit too
late to cancel, I just carried on doing the
upload.Nine months later, the damn virus
appeared!.

CHILD: Huh?